


Snot Nosed Brats

by fragilecapricornpanic



Series: Five [7]
Category: The Umbrella Academy (TV)
Genre: Allison Hargreeves Needs A Hug, Feels, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, Gen, Humor, Light Angst, Number Five | The Boy Deserves Better, Number Five | The Boy Has Issues, Number Five | The Boy Needs A Hug, Number Five | The Boy has PTSD, One Shot, One Shot Collection, Pre-Canon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-08
Updated: 2020-09-08
Packaged: 2021-03-07 08:15:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 780
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26349967
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fragilecapricornpanic/pseuds/fragilecapricornpanic
Summary: Allison is at a meet and greet for her young fans, when she finds herself creeped out by an older man with a moustache who keeps staring at her. Five just wants to see his sister alive.
Relationships: Number Five | The Boy & Allison Hargreeves
Series: Five [7]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1955956
Comments: 2
Kudos: 107





	Snot Nosed Brats

Allison was begrudgingly sat at a lame meet and greet, signing posters for her latest chick flick. All the fans were high school girls, which... okay, maybe it was a _little_ pathetic since she was 23, but Allison was a tad jealous. They were out shopping together, meeting boys, wearing whatever they wanted. Allison didn’t even get the chance to attend high school, never mind all the frivolous fun stuff she missed out on on the side. She just knew she would’ve been prom queen, probably a talented cheerleader dating the most popular quarterback. She needed to stop watching so much Glee... what did Lea Michelle have that she didn’t?!

Glancing up to meet the next in line, Allison’s eyes once again fell on an old man lingering around. He wasn’t even in the line, he was just awkwardly stood in the sidelines - staring at her intensely. He was giving her the creeps. “What’s your name?” Allison asked the tween girl, with a charming false smile. Once she’d scribbled down Jewel-Rae, _seriously who calls their kid that_... Allison demurely stood from her chair and subtly sauntered over to the security guards behind the booth. “Can you get rid of an old guy, he’s making me feel weird...” she requested, glancing over her shoulder nervously. Allison had had stalkers before, even as a teenager. She hoped this guy wasn’t another one. She could always rumor him away, but it never tended to stick. They just came back again once the initial rumor had ran its course. 

“Excuse me, sir.” Five felt his shoulder being tapped. He braced himself to have to kill someone, his mark was in the mob - they could’ve easily followed him. The commission could also be here to terminate him with a bullet through his head, since he’d been secretly dawdling around his sister for two hours. Five knew this was an incredibly stupid thing to do, but he couldn’t stop himself. He missed her. As long as he didn’t spend _too_ long, it should be safe. His hand ready to reach for his gun, Five turned around and was relieved to find the tapping was just a security guard. Five pulled his hand back from his pocket, glad he didn’t need to kill more people than he strictly had to. “Yes?” he snipped, irritated by this punk bothering him. The guard raised an eyebrow, clearly unhappy with Five’s attitude.

The security guard glanced over his shoulder, briefly making eye contact with Allison. Had _she_ sent him over? “You need to leave the store.” he demanded gruffly. Five rolled his shoulders with intense irritation. “No.” he bluntly responded, turning back around to fully face his sister. She looked different from the Allison he left behind, yet different from the Allison he found in the apocalypse. Allison would always be beautiful, Five couldn’t imagine a situation in which she wouldn’t be. Even covered in apocalyptic rubble his sister had looked peaceful. Thinking of her corpse made vomit rise in Five’s throat... he wasn’t there anymore. _He was in 2013, he was okay._ Five could tell from Allison’s demeanour that she was hating this event, even though she was putting on a false grin. Five knew her well enough to know when she was bullshitting. He didn’t blame her for loathing this, why would she want to deal with swarms of snot nosed brats?

“Sir.” the security guard repeated, placing his hand on Five’s shoulder once again. He felt like he was having goddamn dejavú. Five swivelled to face him abruptly, enraged that this asshole was eating in to the precious time he got to be remotely near his sister. He hadn’t seen her in goddamn decades. “I don’t know if you were dropped on the head as an infant-“ he snarled “or if you were born an imbecile, but you need to _back off_.” Five squared up to the man, feeling tempted to pull his gun out after all. Fucking decades. He just wanted a little while to see his sister from a distance, was that too much to ask for? Although he desperately wanted to at the very least punch the man, he knew the commission would certainly find out if he caused a scene. He needed to keep a low profile so he could work on his equations. It broke his goddamn heart.

Quickly flitting her vision across to the sidelines when she heard raised voices, Allison was relieved to see the pervert being escorted from the store. She hoped he would get the message and leave her the hell alone. Someone needs to tell him moustaches haven’t been in fashion for _decades_ , she scoffed to herself.

**Author's Note:**

> It makes me sad Allison has like no tags ))): I love her
> 
> (This is rlly old) for some reason this was saved on my laptop under “KFC” and it made me snort like... what lmfao


End file.
